grief

Losing a family member is one of the most traumatic life events; Families must support one another to endure the five stages of grief and get through it together.

What it is like to have all the problems and being the problem compared to my family.
Hi, my name is Kyle and I am 29 years old. I have 2 brothers, 1 older, 1 younger, I'm the middle of three boys, and my younger sister who came into this life 13 years later. People would say, we look like a normal family, but for me, it was anything but normal. Growing up, I have had so many problems dealing with everything. Things that my family would have once in their lifetime, whereas, I, many times, had these sorts of problems constantly.
By Kyle Pham6 years ago in Families
The Impression of Light
Penny leaned on the doorframe, assessing the room. Lira had a way of bringing the forest green walls of her room to life, like flowers blooming for the sun. Since she’d been gone, the walls sulked in their intended darkness. That was Penny’s favourite thing about her sister. Lira had this power; she could revive anything with a smile or find that which lingered in the dark and coax it back to the light again. It was as if Lira sucked up all the darkness so that light could exist. Penny had a different kind of power, one that relied mostly mostly on disrupting natural order. She was the darkness and Lira seemed to be the only anchor in her storm of chaos.
By Jessica Harvey6 years ago in Families
The Light Between Oceans
There are moments when the weight of grief, the memory of losing a beloved one sits forcibly upon your heart. A gnawing in the pit of your belly begins to grow, a tangible reminder to the reality of your loss. I carry with me the reality of that which is the mourning of my Father from this earth. Yesterday I saw his name on an advertisement across the street and again upon the lips of a barista to whom I asked the name of. I wondered if he could see the tightening of my chest as he said the name of my father, did he glimpse on my face the reality of what was going on beneath? I still have his number saved in my favourite's phone list which I can't bear to remove just yet. I can still rattle off his number by heart. On some days I seem to remember that more than his voice and that frightens me. My tears taste bitter but somehow sweet as I write this, hot and sticky as they stream down my face. The pain in moments seems so unbearable, suffocating and almost without end. Almost. A dear friend wrote to me a tender and kind reminder on paper- "you are never, ever, without family by your side" and an accompanying teapot as a gift that renewed my heart with hope. The world would have you forget, to move on and there are days I find myself so engaged with the hurriedness of life, that I seemingly do. The days drift carelessly and at times almost cruelly by and with it, the familiarity of his face grows dimmer. How could I possibly ever forget, but I have learnt and learning still, how not to succumb to the heavy laden burden of grief. Allowing myself to submerge in the waves when they come, and they will come, but never remaining nor making a home beneath. The air above and the world becomes sweeter when you emerge from the murky depths below. Echoing C. S. Lewis when he wrote about all the agony we go through on this earth will one day be transformed into future glory. I take a breath. And then another. My tears mingle with the salty sea, we seem to share a secret language of aquamarine. I allow myself to be and to become. Surrendering to all that makes this heart of mine softer, stronger. Malleable in the hands of my maker. Light breaks in. The hope of dawn arises, heralding a new day. Not just beyond the horizon, but here, right now. For all to see and be welcomed into.
By Rachela Grace Nardella6 years ago in Families
How To Explain Grief, Loss, and Death To A Child
How do you explain death, loss and grief to children? Many well-meaning adults assume that children do not grieve. They are wrong. Childhood grief is different from the grief experienced by adults, but it very real to them.
By Judy Helm Wright6 years ago in Families
Awakening Through My Father's Death
The week before my father’s death I had some pretty intense stuff happening around me. Specifically, on the portal night of 2.2.2020; I was visited by my guides. I had a listless night of sleep, having extreme dreams, including a lucid dream. I had been tossing and turning, stuck in that twilight sleep already, and time felt like it was moving in a spiral rather than a straight line. Before I knew it, I was in a lucid dream, sleep paralysis and all. Next to my bed stood a very tall, thin, white (almost translucent) torso; I began to panic. Something within me told me to relax. This isn’t malicious; it’s actually one of my guides, and I instantly fell back asleep. While asleep, I dreamt that I was at work but dressed for a funeral. I was running around because I was throwing an event (possibly the funeral), and I then met up with my close friend and his brother. The way I was comforting my friend, I thought the funeral was for his father. I don’t remember anything else from the dream, but I woke again, and I thought my boyfriend was getting into bed. He told me, “You have to move,” because I was on his side of bed; I apologized and rolled over. Some more time passes, and I wake again, rolling over to see my boyfriend wasn’t actually in bed. I suspect what I saw and heard before was my guide once again. I’m not sure what that message was all about, maybe I literally have to move from where I’m living. Maybe I just have to make moves to find my true calling. Who knows? Time will tell. I remember seeing so many different times on the clock, and like I said before, time felt like it was moving in a spiral, like I was re-experiencing times on the clock. I could have sworn I saw 3:33 multiple times. But that night turned into morning, and I had to go off to work.
By Stephie Ross6 years ago in Families
Different
The photo included is of my oldest daughter and my great grandmother. This women adopted me when I was about 2 weeks of age. Legally about 6. I’ve decided to include this woman because it was not until after she passed away that all of questions and vulnerabilities came to the surface. Prior to her passing I have experienced some traumatic experiences that I will write about later on in a separate story.
By Latisha Folden6 years ago in Families
Mirrors of Memory
This is a story. This story is of the author of this paper. The contradiction is that this is a story that seeks to find the start and the end. A never-ending story, in an ongoing process, with various points inside that have a beginning and an end. The end of each of those ruptures in the story has a material manifestation of a variety of forms and shapes. I can only process my story through the processing of remembering and forgetting.
By Petra Kubisova6 years ago in Families
Destination Sunrise
Everyone remembers their first car. More than the shiny parts and rumbling engine, it represents the end of childhood and beginning of freedom and independence. My first ride moved faster and further in my mind than the four wheels could take me, but I longed for every mile and yearned to get there, with no destination in mind.
By Tracy Himes6 years ago in Families
Grief is so weird
Grief is so weird .... It has no boundaries and it has no consideration for anything going on in your life. It has the ability to make you feel incredibly strong for learning how to live with it, and then without warning it has the ability to bring you to your knees in utter pain and sorrow. I’ve said that the 2nd year has been the hardest so far without Donny, but what I didn’t share is how erratic the emotions are that have come with this part of my journey.
By Jessica Richardson6 years ago in Families
Grief
I recently lost my father. It's been the heaviest and most difficult experience I've ever had to face. You wish the world would stop and give you time to grieve but it won't. We live in a "Carry on" society and although I've had tons of support, I can't help but to feel like there's a long, lonely road ahead.
By Karina Nistal6 years ago in Families
Return to Normal
I am almost eighteen when I return to the US after nearly a full year as an exchange student in France. My father picks me up at JFK airport, driving me around Queens and Long Island without specifying his intent. We visit Oyster Bay. But we do not leave the car, except when we look for the bookstore so that I can run in for something to read. On this same day, we drive back from the island up toward Vermont. He takes me through Montpelier, silently driving on our way to Canada. After crossing the northern border, my father insists I draw out my own cash from what is left of my grandmother's small inheritance. We stop at a bank, at a gas station and anywhere we can find. As usual, he stays in the car while I carry on my efforts at his whim. We rarely leave the car on our trips, only stopping for fast food or at gas stations. This is how my father travels through time. In perfect Parisian French, I ask a stranger for a distributeur de billets—an automatic teller machine, which no one seems to have in this land—or at least will not admit to understanding. Increasingly sweaty under a hot summer sun, a lady takes pity on me in my search, "Ah! Vous avez besoin d'un A-T-M." You need an ATM. Yes, in fact, I was looking in vain for an ATM.
By Jennifer6 years ago in Families
Life after a loved one's death
It is tough to want to continue to live once you’ve lost someone. Moving forward is difficult. Existing in a world where that person is not present is hard. All you want to do is to go back. Go back and relive all the memories with that person. Tell this person repeatedly about how much you love them and appreciate them in your life. Hold them tight. Don’t let them away from your sight ever. And spend every single moment you can with them. Because once they are gone, life becomes a nightmare, and finding the motivation to move on is hard.
By map6 years ago in Families